Parties & Celebrations
A Weekend at Oyster Bay, South Africa
There used to be a time when I returned home to South Africa every year to celebrate Christmas with my family, but ever since my mother Gloria turned 80, it’s now her birthday that we all gather to celebrate together. These are precious years to her and to us; each passing birthday is a milestone that touches our hearts. We love to honor her as our mother, a grandmother and a great-grandmother, and getting together to mark an important day in her life and ours is always looked forward to with a year's worth of excitement and anticipation.
Each year it’s a different destination; this year was Gloria’s 83rd birthday weekend and we decided to meet at Oyster Bay Lodge in the Eastern Cape. My nephew Michael Cowie and his girlfriend Alison Davies are the game rangers and handle the management at Oyster Bay, so we decided to make it ours for the weekend. It was an ideal spot with a lodge and a series of quaint bungalows with fireplaces and patios facing the ocean on a pristine white sandy beach. The bungalows are beautifully appointed; I particularly like the freestanding ball and claw tub with a view of the ocean.
It was three days of total love, each a big night with my mother’s actual birthday and the night before made extra special with everyone pitching in and doing something special. My sister Janet and I both love setting a beautiful table; we knew our roles from the outset, and after some consulting with the birthday girl, we decided on a color scheme of turquoise for the Friday night and coral for the Saturday night; two of Gloria’s favorite colors!
The Friday night welcome dinner was a traditional spit BBQ, locally known as a braai. We started off eating dozens and dozens of ocean-fresh oysters topped with a dash of Tabasco sauce while we waited for the hot coals to do their magic. On the grill we prepared legs of lamb, whole birds, and a side of beef on a spit. For our side dishes we stayed close to tradition and enjoyed crispy potatoes along with a selection of fresh summer salads. You can imagine the volume of conversation and laughter as we all shared stories and rehashed funny moments of the past. We seem to tell the same ones every year, but somehow they never fail to amuse us again and again.
The next morning, Saturday, after a delicious breakfast, ten of us saddled up and went horseback riding on the beach. There wasn’t a single person in sight and we had miles of white sandy beach to ourselves; it was amazing! I started out feeling like Bo Derek in the movie 10, and while cantering down the beach, my horse got a fright and threw me off. I returned to the camp feeling like Billy Crystal in City Slickers, horse in tow and never again to get in the saddle, ever! It was a lesson learned that won't soon be forgotten!!
For lunch that afternoon we had a picnic in a traditional African boma set high on the hillside under a thick thatch roof. I loved watching the grooms arrive on horses carrying the picnic baskets filled with snacks, lunch sandwiches, and dessert, making their way over the drawbridge to bring us our meal. Local cheeses along with fresh fruits and wonderful sandwiches were exactly what we wanted, nothing too heavy since we were saving our appetites for a big dinner that evening. With a mixture of potent medications and lots of sauvignon blanc, I chose not to focus on the pain or my injuries and concentrate on celebrating with my mom and family.
After an afternoon nap induced by wine (for my family) and a combination of alcohol and meds (for me), everyone made their way to the bar for cocktails where a roaring fire greeted us along with a chill off the ocean. My friend and spiritual mentor Dr. Linda Garbett prepared a very special treat and wrote a beautiful tribute to my mother of her life story taken from interviewing dozens of family members and friends. In her voice I played this over the sound system. It was a scared moment where we all laughed and cried and brought us all to a point that makes us understand why our family has such an incredible bond between us. After the reading we watched a fun slide show that every family member contributed to with images collected all the way back from my mother's childhood to the present, including her visit to NYC last spring. We covered her entire life in pictures and words and I made copies for everyone to take home with them as their personal keepsake and tribute to a remarkable woman.
Dinner that evening was a delicious, but more importantly, it was a chance for each of us, one by one, to get up and toast our mother, grandmother, and great-grandmother. So many wonderfully touching words were spoken about a truly remarkable force in our lives; just thinking back brings tears to my eyes. For dinner, we stuck with tradition once again and began our menu with a crayfish and prawn cocktail salad. Next up, a delicious freshly caught line fish grilled to perfection. For dessert, a cake we’ve all come to love and one we’ve served for the last three years, called Death by Chocolate consisting of a series of layers of chocolate mousse and meringue. It was then my mother's turn to talk and she spoke of how proud she was of each and every family member and thanked us all for being such amazing children and grandchildren. Afterwards, as is typical of our family, we turned up the volume, played play lists from the 60s to today’s top 20 and partied and danced late into the night and well into the morning.
Sunday morning after brunch we said our goodbyes and all 18 of us went off in different directions with tears of love, joy, and happiness in our eyes. Sadly, as with everything in life, all good things do come to an end but one thing is for sure, those three days spent with my mother and family fueled my soul and will keep me going for the rest of the year until, God willing, we will be together again for Gloria’s 84th birthday next year.
As always, there's more to come!
